How a night club promoter switched to water – with Scott Harrison

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One of the most inspiring testimonies to me is from Scott Harrison, founder of charity: water. I could talk it up – how it’s influenced me, how it has so many different levels of meaning – but I won’t.

Just watch it. Set aside 45 minutes, and watch it.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Use this as a model: for how to share your testimony, for how to live it in the first place.

(2) Today is the last day to contribute to Matt’s goal of raising $1,000,000. Spread the word, not with a mass email blast or anything but with personal requests. And lead by example. Give, even if it’s $5.

Raising money, watering Africa, becoming last – with Matt Windley

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I’ve followed Becoming Last, a blog about putting God and others first, for over a year now. So when Matt told me he was organizing a fundraiser for charity: water and asked me to get involved, I knew I needed to.

See, I’ve loved charity: water since I first heard their story. But, you know, I got lazy and never really did anything to support them. Matt reminded me.

So anyway, I have some other projects planned in the future. For now, I wanted to support Matt with his ambitious goal of raising one-million dollars for clean water in Africa. And along with supporting him, I wanted to get his insight on managing a project like this. What works? What doesn’t?

I asked if he’d let me interview him, and he graciously agreed. So with that, I’ll let him explain what his project is all about.

(Photo: charity: water)

Marshall: So why charity: water? Of all the organizations asking for money, what particularly inspired you about them and their project?

Matt: First, I knew I wanted to do a clean water project. The most vulnerable among us are children, and they suffer the most. Of the 42,000 people who die each week from unclean water and unhygienic conditions, 90% are children. That statistic staggers me. As a parent, I can not imagine watching my child suffer from something as simple as not having clean water.

From there, I chose charity: water because of their innovation, their transparency, and their passion. Visit their website, and you quickly feel their passion for what they do. To top it all off, 100% of the donations given go directly toward clean water projects. They have private donors that fund other costs, so they truly use every last penny that people donate on projects. In that respect, they are truly unique in the non-profit world.

[For a more indepth answer, read Matt's post here.]

Marshall: You’ve shared about it on your blog, but what was the motivation for setting your goal at $1,000,000?

Matt: Hope. All along, I have known that $1,000,000 would take a movement to catch fire or a miracle to occur. I set the goal high because I did not want to get to $2,000 and be satisfied. I think we too easily become complacent with a little charity.

The fact is the Christian church has millions compiled in bank accounts around the world. The money is out there. The question is, “What will we use it on?” $1,000,000 was set as my way of recognizing we have the resources. I pray we hit that number. Maybe it’s unrealistic, but I felt like I wanted to put it out there because I know how much good that would do for those children who are suffering as we speak.

Marshall: So what was your planning process? What did you do ahead of time to prepare for the challenge?

Matt: I’ll be honest. It started practically spur of the moment. I’ve thought about doing something like this for awhile, but had never acted.

One day I just decided I was tired of waiting and thinking and never acting. I sent a few emails to some from blogging friends of mine, talked to my church, and got the ball rolling. I knew this would be a learning experience, but I was prepared to fail and make mistakes because I knew I’d learn and grow from them.

Honestly, my preparation for this was nothing to learn from. If anything I’d say, if you feel God calling you to do something, do it.

Marshall: You’re right on with that. I wish I followed that advice better. It’s awesome that you were able to jump into it like this. Now, what’s worked? For anyone else who wants to set up a my charity: water account, what has been the best way for you to spread the word and raise funds?

Matt: Three approaches have worked the best for me.

First, asking people to be involved in a smaller step (sharing on FB, blogging about it) gave people a chance to buy into the project. Those people were much more willing to give after they got involved in a smaller way.

Second, I am not the type to ask for money, but I quickly found out that good old fashioned asking was extremely effective. I just told people what I was doing and asked if they would share and/or give. Many times they did both.

Third, sharing your heart goes a long way. When people can tell you truly care about what you are doing, they are more receptive to giving.

Marshall: What would you do differently if you were going to do this again?

Matt: This was an intentionally spur of the moment fundraising adventure. That led to many moments of “if only I had thought of that earlier!” For example, local news would love a local story of people trying to raise money for charity. I missed out on getting some publicity there.

More planning would have helped. I think if I had a couple of months to rally some more people around helping, we could have launched larger and made more of an initial surge.

Marshall: Yeah, that’s a tough call. On one hand, you don’t want to delay because, like you said, it’s easy to lose the moment. On the other, some strategy, especially to get others involved, can go a long way.

What about charity: water itself? How could they make the my charity: water process easier for people giving or raising money?

Matt: I have two ideas I wish they could incorporate on their giving site.

First, if they could make it possible to grab a live update of the donation total and put it on a blog or Facebook page, that would be amazing.

Second, I wish there were more ways for donors to interact with the giving page itself. You can put comments when you give, but they are all the way down at the bottom. I would love to see a forum update gadget where people could share why they gave, encourage others to give, or just express excitement for what we’re doing.

Marshall: Okay, let’s switch gears a little: Your blog, “Becoming Last” – I’m a big fan of that title. Is there a story behind it? Why did you choose it?

Matt: For me, it’s the essence of a Christian’s life. For the first twenty some years of my life, I was a Christian, but rarely did the idea of laying down my life ever cross my mind. I began looking at most of the people around me, and it seemed like Christianity had become, “Be a nice person, don’t swear, do the church thing, and you’re good.”

I set out to read through the New Testament, and I could never escape this idea of Becoming Last.

Christianity boils down to putting God first and others second. Jesus said that. Becoming Last is about taking that call seriously.

First Corinthians 9:19 speaks volumes to me. Paul says, “For though I am free from all, I have made myself a servant to all, that I might win more of them.” We are completely free, but because of Christ’s sacrifice we lay down our lives so that more people may know God and He would be glorified.

Marshall: That verse is a favorite of mine too, definitely part of the foundation for bondChristian. I think it’s fascinating to see how this verse plays out in different people’s live. Like for you, how would you say the charity: water challenge fits in with what you’re doing in general on Becoming Last?

Matt: It’s an opportunity for us to widen our view of ‘neighbor’. We are no longer ignorant of what happens around the world. For the church to sit idle, while 42,000 people die a week from something so preventable, is crazy.

It’s not as if we don’t know how to get them water, and it’s not as if we don’t have the money. We simply just haven’t done it.

I believe in missions, taking the name of Jesus to the nations, but why on earth would people listen to our message if we are indifferent to such suffering? This challenge is just a small way to make people aware that we have a responsibility to love the nations, that neighbor love doesn’t stop at our borders.

Becoming Last means to all, not to those whom we find convenient.

Marshall: I get pumped reading stuff like that. So how can we help on this project specifically?

Matt: Several ways. First, pray. I know people always say that, but it’s true.

I highly recommend the biography of George Muller. The man cared for thousands of orphans throughout his life. He never asked for a dime. When their was a need, he prayed and God provided. That is remarkable. I believe God hears the prayers of his people and I hope you’ll pray for our challenge and for those around the world without clean water.

Second, donate. Even if someone gave a $1 or $5, it helps. I’m asking for everyone to at least give something. I believe in the power of small donations. When people give and they share, those donations multiply exponentially together. So start small and if you can give more, that’s great too.

Finally, please share with your friends. Post it on Facebook, Twitter, or wherever. Highlight our opportunity to show the world that the church cares about the hurting and that even small donations matter.

Marshall: Awesome. Thanks so much for sharing with us.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Like Matt said, spread the word. If you have a blog, write about this. If you have a Facebook account, ask your friends to help you. Point them here.

(2) Buy drinks. Twenty dollars gives someone clean water, which is pretty much life-changing.

(3) Lastly, check out what Matt is doing over at Becoming Last. He has some fantastic insights and suggestions. Thank him for sharing.

I thought I dedicated my life to God—until I measured it

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As a bondChristian, I’m called to accept Jesus not just as my Savior but also as my Lord. That’s easy for me to claim, but does my life reflect that? How have I dedicated my live?

The measurements are scary, and not in a good way.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Takeaway:

  • How much money do you make? What percentage of that goes directly back to serving God?
  • There are 168 hours in each week. What percentage of your week goes directly back to serving God?
  • What do you own? How much of that goes directly toward serving the Lord?
  • How many friends to do you have? How many of those connections directly serving God?

Serving Suggestions:

(1) How can you change those percentages? How would your life have to change in order to move from, say, 10% to 60% or from 40% to 80%?

(2) Take it one at a time. Choose the one area that motivates you the most, the area where you can see the most immediate progress, and get started. More on the practical side soon.

Floating $20: How to creep into communalism

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There’s a quaint, little passage at the end of Acts 2 that tells how the early church operated and interacted with one another. Feel free to read it yourself – the whole chapter is awesome – but here’s the part about finances:

“Now all who believed were together, and had all things in common, and sold their possessions and goods, and divided them among all, as anyone had need.” -Acts 2:44-45

(Photo: Sh4rp_i)

That sounds all neighborly and Christian and right… until we recognize the implications. If we take the early church as a model for Christian living, this means you and I are supposed to share everything.

  • “All things in common”: All means all. Sharing all they had meant relying on each other for what they didn’t have, like money to pay bills and so on. It’s hard enough to give things away, harder still to have others do the same to provide for you.
  • “Sold their possessions and goods”: They didn’t keep their old stuff and just shuffle it around. You take my TV – I’ll take your laptop. No, they turned it into cash so they could change their priorities entirely. They became liquid.
  • “As anyone had need”: This wasn’t equality. They didn’t necessarily give everyone the same amount. I’m sure some got more, others less. They distributed as needed, not fairly.

What if we tried to do that today, not as a society or form of government but as Christians, voluntarily? How would it work? If at all?

At the very least, things would be really different, right? Most likely, crazy difficult.

Let’s not forget the overall implications, but for now, here’s a fairly painless way to ease into it, a way to get starting thinking and acting in these terms. (plus, a great way to initiate a Grandfather Effect too).

The floating $20-bill

The process is simple:

  • First, identify someone who needs an extra $20
  • Second,  find $20
  • Third, put the money in an envelope and mark the envelop “Floating 20″
  • Third, give the person the envelope
  • Fourth, tell this person, “It’s not a loan. It’s a floating $20. When you can, pass it on to someone else who needs it.”

That’s the whole thing, and it’s amazingly effective. Until someone does this for you, you don’t really know what it’s like to be on the receiving end. Not only does it help you out, it’s also encouraging to think about passing it on later when you’re able to.

Floating other things

You can modify this a bit too. It doesn’t have to always be a floating $20. For instance…

  • Floating food box: Put together a small assortment of foods, even just a loaf of bread or bag of veggies. Mark the box “Floating food.”
  • Floating childcare/babysitting: Offer to watch a stressed parent’s kids for the evening. Extra bonus for printing out the offer on a slip of paper to look like a coupon.
  • Floating bed: Let people stay the night at your place, free of charge, even if you don’t know them too well. Go the extra mile and tell everyone about your open house policy.

You get the idea. Come up with your own.

Oh, and not to imply anything in Scripture that isn’t there, but I haven’t even mentioned my favorite part about the passage in Acts 2, the result:

“And the Lord adding to the church daily those who were being saved.” -Acts 2:47

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Float $20.

(2) What other ideas do you have? I’d love to hear them in the comments.

Stop waiting on the Lord

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(Photo: xJasonRogersx)

Do you wait until you hear God telling you to go, or do you go until you hear God telling you to wait?

For a while, I answered this question the way I assume most people do, that it’s better to wait on the Lord first. I mean, by God’s standards, we’re a pretty messed up group. We fail on our own. We need God’s help.

So it makes sense to wait to hear God’s voice before rushing into anything. Right? Doesn’t that make sense?

Let’s see…

Direction is more important than decision

As Christians, the Spirit of God is with us. That’s a given. As Christians seeking to follow God’s will, we’re facing in the right direction. Our decisions then aren’t so much between good and bad but between good and good.

For instance, as Christians, are we really having that much trouble deciding between helping a friend move or stealing bread from a bakery? No, the tough decisions are the ones like deciding between helping that friend or going to the midweek Bible study. Those decisions are tough because both options seem good (or in opposite cases, neither option seems good). We honestly don’t know which God wants for us.

Sure, you and I can still make bad decisions. I can and certainly do all the time, even without knowing it. But I think most of the bad decisions you and I make – at least the ones we make without going against God on purpose – are decisions to stop, to hesitate, to not step out in faith.

Why? Because the Holy Spirit is with us, so His momentum moves us forward. Most options that move us forward will move us down the right path. The bad options are the options that keep us from moving forward.

All this to say, I think we need to change our assumptions when it comes to following the will of God.

Action is more important than knowledge

Usually, and I’ll just speak for myself here, I default to hesitation. Like I hear about moving to Saudi Arabia as a missionary, and my first response is, “God, if this is what you want for me, if this is what you’re calling me to do, then let me know so I can move forward with it.”

And then I forget about it.

What’s up with that? Can’t I be pretty sure that moving to Saudi Arabia as a missionary is something God will, you know, most likely appreciate? Don’t I know Him at least that well?

My first response should be more like, “God, I think this is your will so I’m moving forward with it. If it’s not your calling, if it’s not what you want for me, please let me know so I can stop.”

When God doesn’t want you to move forward

Obviously, if there’s a decision you know isn’t part of God’s will because it clearly contradicts Scripture, then don’t go for it. But for everything else, why not move forward until God tells you to stop?

In fact, even if you’re a new Christian, and you don’t know much about Scripture, I’d still suggest moving forward.

God’s really cool about telling you no.

Like if you’re legitimately wondering whether or not it’s God’s will for you to take a job at a strip club, I’d say try going for it. I trust that God will tell you in a hurry that’s not part of His plan for your life.

For example, I’ll tell you right now that working at a strip club is a bad idea. There, end of story. If you don’t trust me on this one, ask some other Christians at a local church. They can help you out and point you to some passages in Scripture. Count that as your confirmation. Then move on to the next option, assume it’s a good one, and move forward.

You can’t underestimate the importance of momentum for obedience.

Moving forward as a default

What if every time you and I heard something that seemed to align with God’s will, we moved forward with it? What if instead of asking for God’s confirmation to move forward, we asked for His confirmation to stop?

Here are a few examples of the changes I mean. What if we thought, and acted, like this?

  • God is calling me to start a church in Alabama—unless I hear Him telling me no.
  • God is calling me to be a missionary to Africa—unless I hear Him telling me no.
  • God is calling me to sell everything I have and give it to the poor in my city—unless I hear Him telling me no.

That’s a crazy lifestyle. Seriously, in practical terms, this will mean you’re constantly reinventing how you live, maybe where you live, and definitely who you live with everyday. It will mean dedicating your entire life, literally, to God’s plan and letting that plan sway you and move you and change you and throw you around.

But isn’t this the lifestyle God calls us to? I mean, check the Bible for yourself. Doesn’t it seem like Jesus is pretty serious about selling everything we own, pretty serious about only taking the stuff we can carry on our backs, pretty serious about leaving everything to follow Him?

You know God’s will

Let me take a step back to clarify something.

I’m not saying to go without hearing from God. I’m saying, you’ve already heard Him. It seems to me that God’s will, His general will at least, is clearly laid out in the Bible.

The problem comes when we start asking for our individual calling instead of trusting God’s general commandments. Unlike the general advice we give, God’s actually does apply to every, single one of us, you know? Have you ever considered that before, that maybe the things He tells all of us to do are actually the same things He’s telling you personally to do right now?

I know. It’s scary for me too. But sometimes scary is an indication of faith in action. If it’s not scary, maybe you’re not really using much faith. That’s not always the case, but I’d say it correlates pretty often.

What do you say?

Do you wait until you hear God telling you to go, or do you go, trusting the obvious stuff He’s already said, until you hear Him telling you to wait?

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Open your Bible to the place where you usually do a daily devotion (or if that’s not in your routine, open to where you might start if you were to begin that routine).

(2) Read until you find the first place where it gives a general command to followers of Christ.

(3) Close your Bible and try following that command immediately. If you had to live that command in some practical way right now, how would you do it? Make this a habit. Stop waiting on the Lord and move forward with what He’s already said.

Where to serve

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Did you know that supposedly over 75% of Americans claim to be Christians?

That’s an insane number. There’s no way it’s really they’re all Christians. You can tell by their fruit, by how they live. But still, 75% compared to other countries is phenomenal.

Can you guess where I’m going with this? In this video, I talk about the example Jesus set for us to follow, where we’re supposed to go, who we’re supposed to reach, and what we’re supposed to share. I also mention some big news for me personally, but I’ll let you watch to find out what that is.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Where do poor people gather in your town? What about the brokenhearted, the captives, the blind? Maybe it’s at the homeless shelter. Maybe an abortion clinic. Maybe on a certain street corner. Go there.

(2) Find someone who could be included in Jesus’s ministry list and then, as a super practical step, invite them to your house for dinner. Or bring food to them. Sit with them and get to know them. Ask them if they know Jesus or want to get to know Him.

(3) Repeat, trying to reach those who are even worse off than the first bunch. That’s where to serve.

Sharing the meaning of life – with Mikey Robinson

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I’m a philosopher by nature and education. Like pretty much every ancient Greek I know, I love the idea of getting together in a public setting, maybe around a meal, to talk about life, beliefs, and all the questions in between them.

On the other hand, I’m a Christian by birth and persuasion. Like the first century disciples, I enjoy studying Jesus’s examples and seeing how I can apply them to everyday life.

So what if you combined the deepness – for lack of a better word – of philosophy meetings with the foundation of the Bible, God’s Word? I’m all over that.

Enter the Alpha Course.

The Alpha Course is for people who might not necessarily go to church but are still interested in trying to answer deep questions. The course gives an overview, in 10 sessions, of what the Bible is all about while trying to answer some of those deep questions, or at least point in the right direction.

I say all this because… well, first off, because I’m a fan of these kinds of courses. But secondly, because I connected with Mikey Robinson who blogs and helps run the Think Alpha website. He actually reached out to me first but then agreed to do an interview here to explain more about what he does and – more importantly – to help us share the meaning of life with others.

Here’s the interview…

*****

Marshall: So, Mikey, how did you get involved with the Alpha Course? What attracted you to it?

Mikey: I was aware of it for a number of years before I got involved in helping with Alpha. I arrived in London a couple of years ago, and one of the first things I felt I should do is an Alpha course. I volunteered to help cook or be in a group, but ended up leading one. It was definitely a steep learning curve, but one of the best things I’ve ever done.

Marshall: I bet. What are some of the most common questions people ask in the course?

Mikey: Each week raises a whole lot of new questions. Personally, I’ve found that depending on a person’s prior knowledge the questions can be quite wide ranging. Some of the most common are who exactly is Jesus and if He is God as He claims, why God lets bad things happen, and who is the Holy Spirit.

Marshall: I think that’s one of the toughest parts of sharing with others, figuring out what they believe already so I can respond appropriately. Do you have any tips for quickly getting to understand where others are at? Like how can we find out what assumptions they’re bringing to the conversation?

Mikey: That’s a tricky one. I don’t personally have any miracle short cuts, but what I found works best is listening, and building friendships, and making sure that you always do this FIRST before you even think about saying what you think, and this is what you can expect on an Alpha course – friends and people who listen. At some point in the process hopefully you get better at noticing the subtleties of how they react (body language, tone, etc). I know I so often fail to listen, and this is something I consciously work on.

Marshall: I’m with you there. Not everyone’s going to join a course, though, or initiate these big questions to give us a chance to listen. So how can Christians help others discover the meaning of life, on a practical level?

Mikey: A great question, and one which is best answered by others wiser than myself. I find that the best way to help others discover the meaning of life is often the simplest, that is to live it. I’ve found that when your life is filled of meaning, others will notice.

Marshall: What does a life filled of meaning look like, compared to one without meaning? For instance, what are maybe a few ways you try to live that out personally?

Mikey: I don’t know if this is the question that needs to be asked here. Everyone finds meaning in their lives, as I mentioned in this article about the Meaning of Life.

I’ve found that in my life if I focus on living my life filled with joy, it will make people curious, and is extremely satisfying and fulfilling. I’ve found (by trial and error) that joy is a distinctly different concept to happiness. Happiness is doing what you want. Joy is doing what God wants, and His way is better because he wants what is best for me.

For me, this is a process, a balancing act, and a life work. Psalm 16:11 says that “in His presence is fullness of joy” so first up, I want to learn how to remain in His presence, and then it’s finding what you’ve been made to do, doing it with all your heart, and loving the people around you with that same devotion.

Marshall: Wow, thanks for sharing that. Let’s shift focus. Can you share a specific example of something amazing that’s happened through Think Alpha, the blog?

Mikey: Personally, I find it amazing every time someone hits our Facebook page and website, and finds a course near them. I mean, it’s no small feat going to all that effort to find out more about God. You’ve got to really want it.

Marshall: Yeah, definitely. I’m constantly amazed too with not only how far but how deeply the Internet can reach. About that, what do you think is coming in the future with the way Christians interact with the Internet?

Mikey: I think particularly with Web 2.0, it gives us a great opportunity. We get a chance to get a lot more personal with people in our audience, and if we create content right, access to their friends as well. I suspect that there is a lot in store in this regard.

Marshall: What are some ways to create content right? What are your suggestions?

Mikey: Again, I think it’s primarily about listening. Most bloggers write about what they’re interested in. Which can be fun, but less relevant, and hence less read and shared. If you learn how to write great headlines and great articles about things that people are interested in, they’ll read it.

I try and write stuff people want to share, which means asking the question, “How is this going to make their lives better.”

Marshall: As regular readers might have noticed, I’m a big fan of all things online. But what about those who aren’t on Facebook every day or don’t have their own blog and so on? How can they get involved?

Mikey: This is pretty common among Christians, as we’re often tech laggards (late adopters of new technology). With web 2.0, we see a gaping opportunity to harness connections between people that we would otherwise never reach. So I’d say “get on board”!

I think this means that we all have a responsibility to learn how to use it better. A good place to start is learning how to share things on Facebook, email, and Twitter.

Marshall: All right, to wrap this up, what would you say Think Alpha’s main mission is, and how can bondChristians help, online and offline?

Mikey: ThinkAlpha itself really isn’t a brand as it’s purpose is to target keywords in Google that are related to people searching for answers and to create content that people will want to share with their friends asking these questions.

As far as bondChristians helping, at the moment, any feedback as to what they would find useful would be great, particularly things they would share and use online. If you have any ideas for E-books, PDF downloads, videos etc, it would be awesome if you could drop us a line.

Marshall: Will do. Thanks so much for your time and insight, Mikey. I really appreciate it and think readers will too.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Check out Think Alpha where Mikey blogs. When you find something you like, share it with your friends. It’s good practice.

(2) As Mikey said, let him know if you have any ideas or suggestions on things that would be useful or spreadable or just plain awesome.

(3) How can you share, by example, the meaning of life? What are some things you can do that are different from what you might otherwise do if you had a different purpose or a different meaning to life? Start a list of ways and then check one off today.

What do you say? Say, “Thank you.”

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Just a quick reminder to say, “Thank you.” It’ll put you in the top 10% at least.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) The example from the video: thank every single person who mentions you on Twitter. Same with Facebook and every other site you like.

(2) Thank people for doing things for you, even if you expect them to: like the man who sells you vegetables or the woman who babysits your kids. (It’s a little like creating a list of reasons other people can be thankful except that you share that list.)

(3) Thank people for doing things for other people, not just for doing things for you: like the guy who vacuums the church or the customer service lady who handles the crazy customer well.

(4) You can email people, call them, write them a Thank You note, speak with them in person… the channels are open if you are.

When to be happy, when to be sad

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There’s some tension between what the Bible says about “rejoicing always” and “mourning with those who mourn.” So how do you and I resolve it? Do we pretend the opposing passages don’t exist, leaning one way while ignoring the other? Or is there a better answer, one that takes both sides into account?

[Click to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Default to happiness. Be grateful for everything and don’t change your mind just because it might make you look stupid around all the non-grateful people out there.

(2) When someone comes to you with problems, feel for them. Don’t try to push happiness automatically. They don’t want a big fat smile from you when you have nothing at stake. They won’t trust it.

(3) The time to push happiness and gratefulness is when you’re hurting. That’s when people see the example and are blown away by it. Then they realize that if you can do it, so can they.

Permission to be hurt

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In the church, we talk a lot about grace, but we often don’t extend it to one another. What I mean is that when someone’s going through some crazy stuff – like when my friend lost her job or my other friend lost his mom – we tend to push back with a bunch of happiness.

Nothing wrong with happiness, but sometimes people just want someone to feel what they’re feeling, or at least try to sympathize with them. In this video, I talk about how God’s given us the permission to be hurt and how we can use that to serve others when they’re hurting too.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) I mentioned sympathizing with your children when they get hurt instead of brushing it off, as though it’s not legit. I think that’s an excellent place to start, with your kids, your spouse, your family.

(2) From there, you can extend it to friends in the church. Ask them how they’re doing, really. And then really listen. Don’t immediately offer advice. Just be an encourager, literally one who “comes along side.” Make them feel comfortable opening up to you. (You can even open up yourself to move the conversation in that direction.)

(3) Finally, you can practice this with people outside the church. Try to affirm what they’re feeling. This doesn’t mean allowing them to complain, but it does mean recognizing that what they’re struggling with is real. Feel what they feel, and then you can both move forward together.