Tag Archives: Thankfulness

What do you say? Say, “Thank you.”

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Just a quick reminder to say, “Thank you.” It’ll put you in the top 10% at least.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) The example from the video: thank every single person who mentions you on Twitter. Same with Facebook and every other site you like.

(2) Thank people for doing things for you, even if you expect them to: like the man who sells you vegetables or the woman who babysits your kids. (It’s a little like creating a list of reasons other people can be thankful except that you share that list.)

(3) Thank people for doing things for other people, not just for doing things for you: like the guy who vacuums the church or the customer service lady who handles the crazy customer well.

(4) You can email people, call them, write them a Thank You note, speak with them in person… the channels are open if you are.

Permission to be grateful

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Have you ever felt like you shouldn’t feel too happy? Like when there’s a lot of tension in the air, have you felt you should quit feeling so lighthearted, cut the smile, and get your business face on?

In this video, I talk about gratitude and how God’s given us permission to be thankful, even when no one else is.

[Click here to watch if you're in RSS or email.]

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Just because everyone else around you looks gloomy, you don’t have to. You don’t have to stare at the ground on the subway. You don’t have to ignore everyone you pass on the street. You don’t have to wait for a problem to come up to call you care about.

(2) Instead, you can call them just to thank them. You can strike up conversations with random people at the park. You can make friends with the bum on the corner and the executive in the corner office. You can laugh out loud at the theater or congratulate your friends when they make ever-so-small progress with their crazy diet. You can be grateful for the smallest things even if everyone else takes them for grated.

Becoming child-like: How to forget worrying and live now

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(Photo: Ana_Cotta)

Children have an amazing ability to anticipate.

They’ll count down to their birthday months ahead of time. Or from the backseat of the van, “Are we there yet? Are we there yet?” Or if you tell them you might bake some cookies, you sure better. They won’t let you forget.

With all that anticipation, though, they don’t really plan well. They get distracted by whatever’s happening at the moment. They forget where they’re going.

…because they love what’s happening now.

In fact, we often say that a person’s ability to persist through distractions is a measure of their maturity. The ability to focus on the future is what separates adults from kids.

I’d like to bring those back together, though, see if we can un-separate them. I love seeing anticipation in the eyes of little children. I’m thinking maybe you and I could copy some of that instead of planning so much.

On planning ahead

Remember when God provided for the (ahem) children of Israel in the desert by sending them manna? God sent flakes of bread from the sky each morning with instructions for everyone to collect enough for one day only. Some of the people of course disobeyed and learned the hard way that manna spoils overnight.

What’s up with that?

I mean, why did God send them bread that would spoil so quickly? Surely He could have sent something that lasted at least a few days, right? Like on Fridays, right before the Sabbath day of rest, God told them to gather enough for two days, and – what do you know! – the manna didn’t spoil then.

No, God knew what He was doing. The manna spoiled on purpose. God wanted the Israelites to learn to trust Him each day, a lesson Jesus echoed hundreds of years later:

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” -Matthew 6:34

What a liberating lesson! And Jesus did more than preach it…

  • When children wanted to climb onto Jesus’s lap, the disciples told them to scram. Why don’t we let Jesus rest so He can share more later? But Jesus wasn’t about that.
  • When Mary wanted to sit and listen to Jesus, Martha wanted to hurry about, preparing the meal. Why don’t we cook now so the food will be ready in time? Jesus wasn’t about that at all.
  • When the woman wanted to dump expensive oil all over Jesus’s feet, everyone wanted her to save it. Why don’t we sell it and give the profit to the poor? Jesus wasn’t about that either.

It’s not that Jesus hated planning. It’s that He loved being present. He wanted to interact with whatever was happening at the moment. Plans can wait. Now can’t.

Jesus enjoyed now. He wasn’t worried about later. Just like a child.

We’re not like that, not usually.

Why we worry

Worry is a result of uncertainty, bad uncertainty. Like those scary movies. The scary parts are when you don’t know what’s going to happen, the suspense, little Miss Whoever in the dark hallway. We get anxious when there’s a chance it could be bad.

That’s what the future is: uncertainty, a type of suspense. When we look into the future, or try to, we end up worrying because it’s unknown to us.

We think we’re being cautious. We think we’re being responsible. But it’s mostly a disguise for our desire to control things. Why do you plan ahead? Why do you prepare? Why do you worry? Isn’t it so you can control the outcome?

Kids know they can’t do much about what happens next. Their parents will feed them, clothe them, and probably even tuck them into bed. Children, young ones anyway, accept that.

As we get older, though, we don’t accept what happens. We want to control it. That’s how the worry creeps in. Because a) we’re not trusting God, and b) we’re not appreciating what we have.

How to stop worrying

The simple answer is to start living now. Children get that. Problem is, you and I don’t know how to live now. Try it even for a second – you’ll see what I mean.

  • Take a moment to try to think of nothing else except what you’re feeling right now. How does it feel to sit where you’re sitting? Where are your hands resting? What happens if you close your eyes? What do you hear?
  • Don’t let your thoughts wonder to any other part of the day: not the past, not the future.
  • Don’t let your thoughts wonder to any other place either. Sometimes, instead of thinking about what did or will happen, your mind will try to think about what’s currently happening somewhere else. Are those cookies burning?

Frankly, the first thing that comes to mind when I try this is some Tibetan monk on a mat in front of a window, meditating. I think, I can’t do this. This isn’t me. I’m not even a Buddhist.

In other words, just focusing hard enough doesn’t it do it for me. Instead, I dig the Philippians 4:6 Approach…

The Philippians 4:6 Approach to anxiety

“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God…” -Philippians 4:6

Let’s break this down:

  • “Be anxious for nothing”: In case it wasn’t clear enough, it’s spelled out here. How much is nothing?
  • “But in everything by prayer and supplication”: God wants us talking with Him, constantly. When we’re aligned with His personality, we can’t worry… because He doesn’t. The more we understand Him, the more we trust Him.
  • “With thanksgiving”: Talk about being present. Instead of thinking ahead or even looking back, consider what you’re grateful for right now. What can you appreciate?
  • “Let your requests be made known to God”: With that mindset of appreciation and desire for communication, tell God what you want.

And look at the promise:

“…and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:7

The Bible doesn’t say God will give us what we want, but it does say He’ll give us the peace we need.

That’s why we can have child-like anticipation. The God of the universe, the God who got Himself killed for you, is certainly going to take care of your tomorrow.

“Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” -Matthew 5:26

So don’t worry about tomorrow. Don’t be anxious about the future. Be ridiculously thankful. Appreciate everything. Enjoy now.

Like children.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Value what’s happening now more than what’s happening later. The opportunities to put this into practice are almost endless. For example, when you’re talking with someone, listen to what they’re saying instead of planning how you’ll respond. Or if someone asks you to do something for them, do it now instead of continuing with your pre-made agenda.

(2) How do you value what’s happening now? By being thankful. I linked to a post about this up above, but in case you didn’t check it out, here it is again. Start appreciating things.

(2) Some things that grab your attention are distractions. That’s what worries everyone about “not planning.” Don’t confuse those distractions, though, with what’s important. You’re not preparing as much, but that’s not so you can waste time on trivial stuff. Do what’s important for right now… right now. Just spend less time planning it.

Becoming child-like: How to play

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Children like to play. Now you’d think that that would be a universal, human trait. Playfulness seems so close to happiness. In reality, though, most of us don’t play, except kids.

(Photo: epSos.de)

I’d like to copy these kids. You?

This is what I did. First, I brainstormed some words that I associate with playfulness. This is what I came up with:

  • Humorous
  • Energetic
  • Smiling
  • Laughing
  • Carefree
  • Festive
  • Positive
  • Lighthearted
  • Spontaneous
  • Fun

To me, that sounds pretty awesome. And it sounds pretty childish too, in a good way. Your list might be a little different, but let’s see if we can distill some of this down to something that can help you and I become more playful.

Playfulness is interested in feeling fun

Your list, my list… it doesn’t matter. All of it centers on feeling fun. Smiles and laughter are expressions of joy. Other words – like carefree, positive, lighthearted, and spontaneous – hint at the type of attitude that allows for playfulness. Finally, you have others that point to specific things kids (anyone, really) do when they’re playful: they joke around, like everything is a game or a party, with tons of energy.

So you have three things, and they all contribute to playfulness:

  1. Attitude
  2. Actions
  3. Expressions

I was watching a friend’s son the other day play with a toy Piggy Bank. He would stick the extra large, multicolored coins into the extra large slot on the top of the bank. The pig would fill up, and then we would take out the coins and do it again. No big deal. But this kid was having a blast, smiling, inserting the coins as fast as his little hands would let him.

I think too often when you and I, grownups, try to play, we only focus on part of playfulness. Maybe we’ll get the actions down, playing Hide-N-Seek, but forget to giggle while trying to hide. Or we’ll want to have fun but feel too self-conscious to let it all hang out on the living room, dance floor.

Playfulness is just that: the courage to embrace all of it, the attitude, the actions, and the expressions. It’s going all in to have fun, forgetting our serious self-image. Kids do that by nature. The rest of us have to relearn it.

And here’s why…

Playfulness is NOT interested in productivity

Somewhere between childhood and adulthood, we learned that productivity is king. Sacrificing present fun for future rewards, that’s the mark of maturity. How can we accomplish as much as possible in the least amount of time with the least amount of effort?

Kids don’t get that. If you ask a young child what she did today, she could totally tell you:

  • I helped mother sew ribbons onto my ballet shoes.
  • I drew daddy a picture of a pony.
  • I played hopscotch with Bethany.

But if you ask her what she accomplished, she’ll probably hesitate. Most young children don’t know what accomplishment means. Even if they answer, they’ll usually mention an accomplishment that will mean absolutely nothing the next day, even to them.

Sure, the ribbons on the ballet shoes might come in handy next week, but you can almost guarantee that’s not why she cared about the project.

Nah, she cared because she enjoyed helping her mom. That’s fun, especially when it involves sewing and ballet. When she was drawing that pony, she didn’t try to conserve blue crayon. She was just playing.

I like that.

So now to learn it.

How to learn playfulness

Let’s take it in steps:

  1. Understand what playfulness is
  2. Understand the motivation for playfulness
  3. Understand what playfulness feels like
  4. Understand how to act playful

We’ve already covered a little about what playfulness is, so let’s get into how to apply it in our own lives.

  • The motivation for playfulness: If you’re pessimistic about life in general, you’ll assume it’s impossible to have fun all the time. Young kids don’t think that. They might realize life isn’t always fun, but they still think it can be. For them, living on ice cream at Disneyland is still possible. For you and I to fully embrace playfulness in our lives, we have to believe it’s possible. We have to be so insanely thankful that we know satisfaction is possible. Most adults, including me, don’t know that, not completely.
  • The feeling of playfulness: Giddiness. That’s the best word I can come up with to describe the feeling. It’s like when you’ve had a little too much coffee and sugar, not jittery yet, but where you’re like, “I’ve got to do something. Let’s do something. What do you want to do?” It’s a paradox. You’re so satisfied that you want to change it. Or, really, you want to share it. Nothing is serious. Everything is a game, and you want everyone to join in.
  • Playfulness in action: Once you have those first two parts, the motivation behind you and the feeling inside, the rest is easy. It’s basically whatever happens. That’s why it’s so spontaneous. For instance, try doing something that gets you absolutely nowhere. Do something, not nothing, but still get nowhere and enjoy it. That’s playfulness.

It starts with gratitude, builds into giddiness, and finally expresses itself in spontaneity. If you try to be spontaneous without the giddiness, it doesn’t work. If you try to be giddy without the gratitude, it doesn’t work. You need all three parts in the correct order.

That’s why we mess it up so badly. We try to play Hide-N-Seek without the joy that motivates it. We go into it without any fun and then turn around and say, “Hey, look… this isn’t any fun.” You can try all the tactics in the world – always smile, laugh with everyone, make eye contact – but without the starting point, it all falls flat.

Children don’t have to understand this. It’s built into them. But the rest of us, as I said before, have to relearn it. Thankfully, it’s not that hard. Sometimes, it’s as easy as giving ourselves permission.

…permission to not be productive.

…permission to have fun.

…permission to be a kid.

“A merry heart does good, like medicine, but a broken spirit dries the bones.” -Proverbs 17:22

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Hang out with people who are ridiculously thankful. Pay attention to what they appreciate. Copy that.

(2) Hang out with kids. Let them play with you, jump on you, run with you. They’ll rub off on you if you let them.

(3) As you’re going through your daily habits, ask yourself, “How can I do this playfully? Or how would I do this if I felt playful?” Better yet, “What would a kid do?”

Thankful for hands, eyebrows, things you’ve never lost

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I’m going to make a big assumption here: you have both your hands. And I’m going to make an even bigger assumption here: you’re not as thankful as you should be.

(Photo: Michael Hayman)

A couple months ago, a man received two hand transplants. Evidently, he’d been burned, but the doctors were able to successfully attach two new hands, only the third time in history. I heard about all this because I live in Louisville where the surgery took place.

What struck me, though, was how grateful this guy is. I’m not sure if he’s a Christian, but he sure seemed like it on TV. Perhaps everyone does after experiencing something like that.

This man was perfectly healthy before his accident, at least as far as hands go. But then he was burned. Then the transplants. Then the physical therapy. And now he’s slowly getting back to normal, though his hands will never be normal again.

So why’s he thankful?

I think this man is thankful because he lost so much and then was given so much. Getting new hands must have taken him from one of the lowest points in his life to one of the highest.

But consider you and I (I’m still assuming you have both of your hands). Objectively, you and I have more than this man has now. Our hands probably work better than his new ones ever will. But – I’ll just speak for myself here – I’m nowhere near as thankful for my hands as this transplant patient is.

As far as health goes, I’m better off than he is. As far as gratitude goes, I have a long way to go.

I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me, but I keep coming back to this guy’s story. The Lord gives and the Lord takes away, but why does He have to take away first for us to notice Him giving anything? If He just gives, most of us never notice.

  • I’m not thankful for my hands, not daily.
  • I’m not thankful for the ability to walk, not when I’m freezing outside.
  • I’m not thankful for simple things like clean water to drink and air to breathe.

Thankful for eyebrows

My dad and I talked about this one day on the way to a Bible study years ago. The sun blared at both of us as it set on the horizon. Thankfully, we both had eyebrows and eyelashes and eyelids. We both could squint to protect ourselves from blindness. We were even able to admire the beauty of it all as we talked and prayed before the study.

If you had asked me last week, I might have said I’d never forget that time with my dad and how since then I’ve been thankful for eyebrows.

But really, I forget, like everyone else… and I’m not that thankful, not daily anyway. I still need the reminders. I think most of us still do, even when we’ve experienced tragedies in our lives that we assume we’ll never forget.

I don’t think God burned that guy’s hands just so He could remind me to be thankful. Maybe He did it to remind the guy, but even that sounds callous. Regardless, God definitely took advantage of the situation to remind me. Because I have both my hands, but I’m not as thankful as I should be.

Is it too much of an assumption to say the same is true for you?

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Count your blessings, on paper. What are some things you’ve never lost but that you should be thankful for? Think of things you might consider essentials, things you’d have trouble doing without but that no doubt some people do do without.

(2) Share these things with someone else. Tell people why you’re thankful, not just the things you’re thankful for but also why you’re thankful for them. Seriously, no one cares if I’m thankful for my hands until I tell them the story of the guy who lost his.

Others-oriented gratitude: Creating reasons for THEM to be thankful

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(Photo: Kıvanç Niş)

Last week, I made a Thanksgiving shift. I shifted from thinking of thankfulness in terms of how I’m blessed to thinking of thankfulness in terms of how others are blessed. Call it others-oriented gratitude.

Once I realized it, I wondered how I’d missed it for so long.

After all, I try to be all about others-orientedness. I try to feel what others might feel. I try to align my feelings with theirs. It doesn’t always happen, but I thought I’d made more progress than I had. Clearly, I wasn’t as far along as I thought.

On top of that, it struck me that others-oriented gratitude totally aligns with God’s nature. I’d missed that too:

“Then the righteous will answer Him, saying, ‘Lord, when did we see You hungry and feed You, or thirsty and give You drink? When did we see You a stranger and take You in, or naked and clothe You? Or when did we see You sick, or in prison, and come to You?’ And the King will answer and say to them, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’ ” -Matthew 25:37-40

Not only is God grateful when others are blessed, He’s also in the business of creating reasons for people to be grateful. What else do beautiful sunrises accomplish? :)

Realizing this was a big shift for me. I starting thinking that if you and I can be grateful when others are blessed, then we can (and should) also get on board with creating reasons for people to be grateful, you know, mirroring God’s nature.

That’s what I’ve been working on and what I’d like to share with you…

Step 1: Inspiring others to be thankful

When you and I reflect on things we’re thankful for, we can usually place them in one of four groups.

The first group is purely God-given: things like trees, fresh air, the ability to walk. We won’t talk much about that now because this post is all about how you can be part of the process. The next three groups, though, are groups where you and I can play a role in why someone is thankful.

Giving something amazing

  • Selling someone a car for a dollar
  • Paying someone’s tuition
  • Buying someone cruise tickets

These are all examples of ways you and I can give amazing things. These stand out for people because they’re big and usually make a big difference in people’s lives.

Doing things unexpectedly

  • Giving back a lost wallet (with all the money still in it)
  • Sharing some garden vegetables with a neighbor
  • Picking up the tab for lunch

Things in this group are both easier, because they cost less, and harder, because you can’t always plan for them.

Being someone close

  • The grandma who always sends birthday cards
  • The friend who calls right when someone needs a call
  • The dad who takes his kids to the park… and actually plays with them there

These are the hardest to engineer. They’re more about who you are than what you do. But you can still make progress by, each day, doing little things that matter, things that bring you deep into the lives of the people around you.

Really, anytime you serve others, you’re giving them a reason to be thankful. But in practice, that doesn’t always work out. These three groups I’ve mentioned are, I think, the most notable ways you and I can impress thankfulness on other people’s lives.

But all of this is really only Step 1.

Step 2: Encouraging people to bless others

Often a partial measure of our success is how well it transfers to the next generation. Because you and I, individually, can only impact so many people. The real work happens when we’re able to inspire others on the same mission.

So that’s what Step 2 is really about. How? Well, as with everything, I think there are three ways to do this (and you and I should use all three):

  • Pray: Get the Holy Spirit working, influencing lives.
  • Live: Be an example of someone who blesses others.
  • Tell: Share with people about what’s been done for you, what you’ve done, and – perhaps most importantly – what they can do to bless others.

When it comes down to it, all Christians are part of the same body. So it only makes sense that we should bless others and be overjoyed when they are blessed, for then the blessings are ours also.

And for that, you and I can be insanely thankful.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) How can you create a reason for someone to be thankful? Think of the three groups I mentioned: giving something amazing, doing something unexpectedly, and being someone close. Can you use one of those? It’s not that difficult. It’s just a matter of thinking in different terms and then setting aside your own desires for a few moments. Not hard at all, right? :)

(2) How can you encourage others to start thinking and acting this way? One way might be to acknowledge when people do things to bless others. Another way might be to create some accountability between you and a friend, keeping each other moving forward and blessing others. Again, it just takes a little thought and some personal sacrifice.

Thanksgiving killer: Reflecting on yourself

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If I had to pick just one holiday, Thanksgiving is probably my favorite. As you know, I’m not one to push my opinions on other people, but I think every country in the world should have some version of Thanksgiving. :)

(Photo: tuchodi)

I love that there’s not a lot of pressure around this holiday. It’s just about getting together with family and friends, eating, talking, and enjoying the abundance of life. I like that.

Here in Louisville, I’m usually invovled in three separate get-togethers: one with one side of my family, one with the other side of my family, and then one with my church.

Well, I’m through the first third of those celebrations, and I’m still not really feeling the Thanksgiving spirit. I feel sort of blah… know what I mean?

I’m a fairly reflective person. I like to think about what I’m thinking about. So naturally, that’s what I did. I wanted to know why I was kind of down, especially this time of year when I’m usually up.

And – surprise, surprise – that actually made me feel worse. Aaaah, not cool.

What I (re)discovered about reflecting on myself

I was channeling everything inward. And that never helps.

Remember when I talked about selfishness vs. self-centeredness? Self-centeredness is all about ignoring others, right? That’s what I was doing, and it’s wrong.

So, I decided to switch things up. Instead of a list of reasons I’m thankful, I started a list of reasons other people can be thankful, a list of reasons I’m thankful for things they have.

That’s all I’m going to say about the project now. You’ll hear more about it soon. Point is, it’s amazing. So…

Some rapid-fire, unsolicited advice

  • Don’t search within yourself to find things you’re grateful for. Instead, look around.
  • Don’t wait for good things to happen to you. Instead, help good things happen to other people.
  • Don’t look for achievements so much as for satisfaction.
  • Don’t strive for greatness but for leastness.

Because when you search for something within yourself, you’ll won’t find anything. But when you empty yourself, you’ll find everything.

“He who finds his life will lose it, and he who loses his life for My sake will find it.” -Matthew 10:39

Thanksgiving is found in others, not yourself.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Of course, you know my suggestion, right? Start a list of reasons other people can be thankful.

(2) With your list, be specific. Include, “Johnny was able to get the cast off his arm,” instead of, “People in the world have arms they can use.”

The 7 benefits of serving others

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(Photo: Shermee)

What’s the big deal with getting everyone to serve others? Why not just have everyone serve themselves? After all, that would cut out the trouble of figuring out what other people want.

The fact of the matter is this: God works this way (He serves others), and He wants us to do the same. He’s set it up so serving others accomplishes almost everything He wants for us.

Here’s how. Here are the seven big benefits of serving others. (Watch for overlap. God loves overlap.) :)

1. Serving creates meaningful thankfulness

Serving is a way to give back that’s actually meaningful and shows we’re really thankful.

Jesus died so we could hang out with God. We say we’re thankful for that. We say it’s the best thing that’s ever happened to us. But if that’s the case, shouldn’t our live be totally different? I mean, what would happen if someone gave you a new house or a million dollars? Wouldn’t your life change?

Serving others is the result of truly realizing what Jesus did for us. We actually want to tell everyone in the world about it, not just through what we say but also through what we do.

Serving others is the result of our insane thankfulness. That’s the motivation behind serving. That’s why we serve. Because serving gives us a way to live thankfulness.

2. Serving blesses the person you’re serving

Perhaps the most obvious of obvious benefits, serving others actually serves others. Who knew!

Serving makes the world a better place. :)

It’s the same reason so many world changers try to serve others too, or at least look like that’s what they’re doing. They know that pulling it off is world changing. Problem is, they don’t have the support to actually do it completely selflessly.

But we do. Or should.

3. Serving encourages other Christians

When other believers see you serving others, they get fired up. Don’t discount the power of peer pressure, or peer motivation.

“And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ…” -Ephesians 4:11-12

4. Serving non-Christians opens them to Christ

As far as practical benefits go, this is probably the biggest. Serving others includes sharing the gospel, but that’s not what it’s all about. Serving others, as you might have noticed from the articles around here, includes mundane stuff like taking pictures, playing cards, or baking cookies.

All those mundane things add up. And someday someone somewhere will notice and ask about it. And you’ll have opened someone to the gospel. How much is that worth?

By the way, check out this video with Lee Strobel sharing a practical example of this.

5. Serving glorifies God for other non-Christians

We can’t serve everyone. But almost everyone can see the example in the few people we can serve.

See, when Jesus came to earth, He tried to taught that we’re supposed to build our reputation around serving others, caring for people, and loving them.

“By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” -John 13:35

When we serve others, people notice. When they see us serving, they see part of God’s nature. They can still reject it, but it’s much harder to reject when they can see it at work, even if we’re not serving them directly.

6. Serving honors God

Even if no one else sees you, even if no one else cares, God sees and God cares. Yep, it’s cheesy and cliche, but that’s because we repeat it over and over again without really doing much about it.

“If anyone ministers, let him do it as with the ability which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom belong the glory and the dominion forever and ever…” -1 Peter 4:11

Serving is success whether anyone else cares or not.

7. Serving encourages yourself

Encouragement is amazing like this. When you encourage someone else, the encouragement comes back around to you. It’s a side effect, and it works two ways.

First, serving others often means learning amazing things and reminding others of these amazing things. But guess what? In the process, you remind yourself, which builds you up too.

For example, if you share the Bible to encourage someone else, you’ll find you’re building yourself up because you’re in the Bible also.

Second, the response from others is infectious. Of course, it won’t always be outstanding – sometimes, people won’t care. But when they do, you’ll know you contributed, through God’s grace, to their growth. And that is totally encouraging.

For example, when you help someone overcome a temptation, you also end up with even more motivation to flee that temptation because you see the amazing results in your friend, to say nothing of the accountability that’s built in.

It’s a big cycle.

  • You’re encouraged, which means…
  • You’ll want to serve even more, which means…
  • You’ll get even more encouraged, which means…
  • You’ll want to serve even more, which means…

Well, you get the idea. The process repeats over and over again. Like a body healing itself, it’s just the way it’s designed.

We serve because of what God’s done, and the more we serve, the more God does. That’s why serving others is so, so amazing.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Serve others. Get caught in the serving cycle where serving leads to more serving and more serving.

(2) What are some practical examples of how these benefits have worked out in your life? Pick one of these seven and share a personal story in the comments.

Unbelievably blessed and how to share it

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You are literally unbelievably blessed. “Literally” as in no one can possibly believe how blessed you are.

(Photo: Prabhu B

But as Christians, you and I often have a problem. “Why doesn’t anyone believe this amazing news?” we wonder. Some of us try to dissect how and why we’re not relevant to contemporary society. Others suppose we’ve compromised the gospel so much that our message lacks the power it should have.

You and I and everyone else can analyze it all we want, but the core reason we struggle with this doesn’t have anything to do with our presentation. It has to do with the basic truth of the gospel.

The gospel message says we’re unbelievably blessed. God reached down to earth and communicated with us… and still does. He sent His Son to die so we could keep talking.

Think about that. Is it any wonder no one believes us? It’s written right into the definition of the gospel: we’re not believably blessed – we’re unbelievably blessed. Guys, that changes everything.

Let’s try the “just try it” approach

If we’re sharing a message that’s unbelievable, we can’t appeal to logic. Appealing to logic weakens the message by making it more believable. Instead, our message works like this:

  • I can’t even tell you what I’ve got. It’s a surprise.
  • Here’s how to try it out though. This is the only way you’ll understand even a sliver of it.

Contrast that to the pop approach:

  • Here’s what I have.
  • Here’s what it can do for you.
  • Here’s how to get it.

I mean, at first, that sounds great. But what really happens? If we don’t share enough of how amazing God is, no one’s interested. If we share too much, though, no one believes us. At that point, instead of moving into “just try it,” we move into more explanation.

The truth is, no matter how much we explain it, they’re not going to get it. It’s unbelievable. So my theory is to cut out as many steps as possible and jump right into “just try it.”

A Chinese example of “just try it”

(Photo: Jason Lam)

There’s a restaurant at a mall here in Louisville called Max Orient. It’s Americanized Chinese, and it’s known at least city-wide for the women up front asking everyone who walks by, “Sample, sample, sample?” They hold out toothpicks with chunks of mouth-watering chicken and pork for anyone to try.

I’ve never asked for their numbers, but I’d bet they have – no joke – 10 times more customers than any other place nearby. Other than Chick-fil-a, which is popular with my friends because it’s a Christian business, Max Orient is the only restaurant in the food court that anyone talks about.

Why?

  • Because they let you try it.
  • Because what you try is delicious.

That’s how we share our unbelievable blessings. We get people to taste them. We can sort out the details afterward.

How to give a taste of those blessings

1. Be a Christian. God loves blessing His followers. Sometimes those blessings don’t come the way we want them, and yes, sometimes – most of the of the time – it’s hard. But if you’re a Christian, you are and will be blessed.

So act like it. Respond to God’s blessings by living an insanely grateful life.

2. Live among non-Christians. It’s easy to clique up and avoid the rest of the world. Christians share many of the same interests and ideas. It’s scarier to congregate with people who live and think completely differently from you.

But go for it. Live outside the Christian Ghetto. That’s how the rest of the world gets a taste of our blessings: God blesses them too just because they’re so close to us. Unbelievable blessings can’t help but impact those around us.

Okay, here’s a quick summary

You’re unbelievably blessed.

No one believes unbelievable blessings. They just have to experience them.

You can share those blessings, though, by living like you’re blessed around others and letting your blessings rub off on them.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Whenever I talk about this, I get skeptical responses. Some Christians don’t like fast-food, no commitment relationships with Jesus, and “just try it” seems too close to that. Does it to you? Why (or why not)?

(2) One practical benefit of being unbelievably blessed is that worry disappears. That alone, if it’s legit, is enough to compel tons of people to want what we have. So try not worrying. Yes, it’s way harder than me just saying, “Don’t worry.” But really… are we unbelievably blessed or not?

(3) Worry is just one benefit. What else is there? How else does that play out in everyday life? How will others experience it? How can you help others experience it?

“Everyone’s bad”: A guide to optimism

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When pessimism, when optimism? (Photo: VinothChandar(AWAY) )

“Despite everything, I believe that people really are good at heart.” -Anne Frank

As much as I love Anne Frank, she’s wrong – people are bad.

Jesus even called someone out who called Him good because He wanted more clarification:

“So Jesus said to him, ‘Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God.’ ” -Luke 18:19

That’s the approach I take with optimism. In short, no one is good but God.

God’s good

“[M]y God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” -Philippians 4:19

This is the optimist side of Christianity. God is good, so we know He’s always going to do good things.

  • Like keep His promises.
  • Like stay with us all the time.
  • Like give us eternal life with Him.

This side of optimism is fairly intuitive. The difficulty here is in actually living it out when circumstances don’t feel so peachy.

What’s not so intuitive is the other part…

Everyone’s bad

“[A]ll have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” -Romans 3:23

According to God, that means everyone’s bad.

In context, I think Christians understand this. But without the context, a lot of Christians agree with Anne Frank and most of the rest of the world – they think people are pretty much good.

Why assuming bad is good

Pessimists (they like to call themselves “realists”) think their perspective gives them an edge up because they can plan for bad instead of getting ripped off by it.

In other words, pessimists are pessimists so they won’t be surprised by pain.

Fair enough. I think part of that applies for Christians as well. For example, we shouldn’t be surprised when we hear of school shootings. That’s the natural result of life without God.

But there’s a deeper benefit of assuming everyone’s bad:

We should be pessimistic about people so we’ll be surprised by good.

Optimism vs. pessimism example

Have you ever helped out a homeless person, something simple like chatting for a while?

If you have, you know that homeless guy is probably insanely thankful you took the time. Like falling all over you thankful.

On the other hand, if you’d chatted for an hour with your neighbors, how thankful would they be? They might say thanks, but it’s probably no where near the level of appreciation you received from the homeless guy.

Why pessimists are more thankful

The homeless man didn’t expect anything from you. He assumed you’d ignore him like almost everyone else.

In general, though, the rest of us expect people to act fairly friendly. Chatting with a neighbor isn’t life changing.

So the difference is expectations. The homeless man was pessimistic about you, but you broke that expectation by being friendly. That’s why he was thankful.

Your neighbors, though, were optimistic about you. Their thankfulness level would only change if you did something bad – in that case, it would go down because you’d break their good expectations of you.

So pessimists can be more thankful because for them bad is the default and good is a blessing instead of good being the default.

Why we’re joyful

Overall then, we’re joyful because…

  • You and I are bad, but God is good, so when He blesses us, we’re thankful because we know we don’t deserve it.
  • Everyone else is bad, so we expect the worst but are thankful for the best.

We’re optimistic about God but not anyone else. [For more on this perspective, check Rights vs. Privileges.]

So listen, Anne Frank and everyone else who thinks people are basically good, you’re not giving yourself a happier attitude – you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

You actually experience a happier attitude when you assume everyone’s bad because then you’re insanely thankful when God works through them to do good.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) This is one of those perspectives that’s difficult to understand until you try it. So that’s my suggestion. Try it… even for only a day. Are you more thankful when you’re assume the best or assume the worst?

(2) Beyond the practical benefits of increased thankfulness, which is more accurate? From a biblical perspective, are people basically good or bad? I think the Bible is clear on the answer, so I encourage you to study it for yourself to immerse yourself in this perspective.