10 common mistakes of wannabe bondChristians

The other day, I was like, “Hmm… what are some of my most common mistakes in ministering to others? Where do I mess up the most?”

So I started a list. The list grew pretty big. So I began cutting it down, keeping only the most common mistakes. Here are the seven I kept in the list, seven mistakes wannabe bondChristians seem to often make:

1. Defining success incorrectly

I want to see results. I want the new Bible study to grow. I expect the people attending the new Bible study to grow. But that doesn’t always happen. And when it doesn’t, I get discouraged. Why? Because my day to day definition of success is messed up. (Psst… here’s a better definition of success.)

2. Expecting their quality of life to improve

Evidently, we’re not so swift with sharing the real gospel – we share a feel-good version. The real gospel is about Jesus dying so we can be good without actually doing good stuff. The rest of the world, though, doesn’t get that, so it’s not going to ease up. If anything, life in Christ is harder than life outside of Christ. But of course I forget that way too often.

3. Failing to go all in

If you’re in ministry, you’re in full-time ministry. I keep hearing, “Everyone has a different calling.” I agree. Some really are called to minister by working 9-5 filling out tax forms or whatever. But really, I think most of the time it’s a cop out. It is for me anyway.

4. Ignoring what people want

Yep, I care about myself. I write about caring about others, but really, I care about myself. So naturally when I do try to care about others, I automatically want to serve the way I want to serve. But that’s not really serving. Serving is meeting needs, but meeting needs is often meeting wants.

5. Downplaying the value of faithfulness

I’ve said before that faithfulness is probably the most important characteristic of any follower, any servant, and certainly any Christian. But I can’t remember the last time I sat down, thought out some action steps to grow my faithfulness, and then got back up and did something about it.

6. Making assumptions about what Jesus wants

Here’s a big one: love. It’s easy to read verses about Jesus loving others but then superimpose my own definition of love. It’s easy to do the same for truth. Instead of digging into who Jesus actually is and asking Him specifically for direction, I like to make assumptions. Have you ever considered that maybe you do too?

7. Focusing on what they can do for Jesus

Oh, look, I can get involved in this program. I can talk with all these people. I can… blah, blah, blah.

That’s how we burn out. While the other stuff might be important results, I should be focusing on what Jesus does for me… and sharing that. The greatest work we can do for God is believing Him.

8. Trying to change people

People change when you change. When you open up, they open up. When you start trying to understand them instead of just trying to change them, they start trying to understand you. That’s where the real change takes place. But going at it head on – just trying to change people – only creates resistance.

9. Following trends or trying to create new info

Reminding… that’s where it’s at. When I dive into the ministry, I often find myself trying to create my own version of everything. What’s with that? All the info is already out there. Why not grab what someone else has already done and repeat it? Sure, there’s a point where cookie cutter caring gets ridiculous, but the fundamentals are always the same. (If not, something’s wrong.)

10. Complicating things

You won’t remember all 10 of these. You probably won’t even remember two by tomorrow. That’s cool. The whole point is to simplify, not complicate. I’m guilty of this. I’m sure you are too. We like creating methods and strategies and proven principles that work, especially if we can take credit for coming up with them. Truth is, though, it’s really as simple as following a good example… leaving it at that.

Serving Suggestions:

(1) Do you relate to any of these? Which do you find yourself falling into the most?

(2) Once you identify which area you have the most trouble with, consider spending a week specifically improving that one area.